I am behind on posts from the cruising life; I’ll be catching up on them this week now that I have reliable WiFi. But I wanted to give a live update that my 16-day cruise is officially over; we disembarked in San Antonio, Chile this morning.
For the next week or so, I will be parked at an AirBnB in Santiago, Chile. Ending this chapter of my life is proving to be an adjustment. I’ve spent the last 4 months in a state of new-ness and anticipation about all the wild experiences to come. On board, there were endless distractions to keep me occupied. Magicians and dancers, slot machines and hot tubs, bottomless meals and a steady supply of travel companions. It has allowed me to not focus so much on the world cruise that never happened. But today, walking the streets of Santiago, I am feeling a bit resentful that I’m having to make decisions I thought I would not have to make for at least 3 years. Having to ad lib my life—constantly improvising where I’ll go, what I’ll eat, where I will sleep—is making me feel weary. I no longer need my sea bands for rough seas, but am feeling a different kind of wobbly. As I leave our Norwegian Sun behind, it feels like a little light has gone out of my life.
I am grateful for small moments of comfort. Walking the streets of Santiago in search of a meal, a Dunkin’ store appears as if by magic, the first one I’ve seen in South America. Never underestimate the comfort of the familiar; It feels like a warm hug in my ocean of melancholy and is my first smile of the day. (With the bonus that I don’t have to pull out Google Translate to translate “Bavarian Kreme.”)
Later, as I walk out of my apartment, a pretty woman calls out to me: “American?”
“Yes,” I answer back.
She smiles broadly and says “I love you too,” momentarily perplexing me because I wasn’t aware I had professed my love to her.
“I love Americans. We have that great look about us, don’t you think?”
I check out her “look” and then mine, and have no clue what look she’s referring to. Perhaps she is high, or just high on life. But on a day when I’m feeling a bit raw, I’ll take any affirmation that gets thrown my way. So I laugh and say, “yes we do, don’t we” and feel just little less heavy.
(Thanks to Denise D for the “ad -libbing” terminology. It feel very appropriate.)
12 responses to “Ad-Libbing My Life”
A friend once told me that some dreams are meant to remain dreams. As you emerge from your water adventures, you will grab a breath and find a path, which likely includes Dunkin and strangers who recognize you for the gifted, adventurous soul you are. Seems like you have a team to love you along the way.
Thank you, dear friend.
Concentrate on self love this week. A “pick me up” week of things that relax you. Watching a sunrise or sunset, taking some photos, visiting a park where you can immerse in nature. A daily Dunkin’ run! Anything that brings you peace. Listen to your heart always, it won’t steer you wrong.
Thanks Elaine. Doing my best to do that.
thank goodness for dunkins. I totally get it. I trust you will figure it out – and worse case you can accept one of the many invitations for lodging you have gotten from family/friends. Sending you hugs and more hugs.
Thanks for the hugs, much appreciated!
I am hopeful that you find a lovely, longer term cruising experience. Enjoy the adlib life for the moment.
I am too. And doing my best to enjoy the adlib life for now.
I so appreciate your reports of your adventures, as do many of my friends in Arizona. Even though I have been home for two months today, I feel a bit disconnected. Safe travels to us all!
Hi Andrea, happy to know you are still following the blog. I just saw that you signed up for another cruise. Perhaps our paths will cross again someday?
Awe Basia!!!!!!!! Only you can find a Dunkin Donuts in the middle of a storm. A sight of good things to come !!!!!
Ha! Dunkin’ in the middle of a storm. That should be the title of my autobiography.